Wednesday, September 23, 2009

science fiction film Crude

Robot invaders that look like they were made from old, scrap boilers
or battered, galvanised bins. Hub caps sprayed in dull silver dangling from a fishing line in front of a painted sky-scape. Clearly visible seams where the backdrop was joined together to imitate a starry sky. Old egg cartons and fizzy pop lids glued onto sheets of badly painted corrugated cardboard then shoved into a corner with drapes hiding the room walls.  And finally a bunch of amateurs roped in at the last minute to make up the cast of your low to no budget film, written in thirty seconds as one draft, on the back of a fag packet after a few pints and a curry!  Welcome to the world of – Dang! Dang! Daaaaaah! – crud movie mania!!!!!

 Yes, girls and boys, JD Doc admits to being a lover of all things Crud, with a capital ‘C’; at least, that is, when it comes to vintage science fiction films.  There is much mirth and wonder to be had in this genre, especially in anything that pre-dates the likes of the Star Wars franchise, which, even back in the 70s, offered a more ground-breaking and sophisticated alternative to your ‘Earth Versus the Flying saucers’ or ‘Fiend without a Face’, both of which are hot favourites of ‘The Doc’.  For, as filming techniques and technologies become more sophisticated, so too have the resulting films.

The Doc is no Philistine; in fact, this ‘scientist’embraces the use of whatever one can find in order to make real whatever cinematic idea is in one’s mind, whether it’s a three year epic of a project or a three hour shoot!  Grab that video camera, mobile phone
camera, 8mm cine camera (or whatever your tool of choice) and rope your mates into that ‘fag packet’ crud.  It’s your dream, so follow it!  The Doc did – and still does – whenever the opportunity arises.  This may seem completely pointless when the resulting piece of crud will never be seen by more than maybe ten to twenty people.  However, The Doc can attest to the fact that, to imagine and then complete something that you’ve conceived, is highly exhilarating. Especially when it looks like the kind of exciting crud you meant it to look like.  Cheap as chips, as they say!  But fun at every stage.

One can only imagine how Edward D Wood Jr. felt on completion of the notorious ‘Plan 9 From Outer Space’, the oft-called ‘worst film ever made’.  It wasn’t meant to be a classic or a blockbuster, just a fun-filled ‘popcorn’ movie, a bit of harmless entertainment.  After all, didn’t we all at some point in our childhoods, wile away the hours pretending to be something or other whilst at play in an imaginary world?  And don’t we often recall and miss those ‘innocent’ days, when we didn’t worry about paying bills?  There comes a certain point in life when the laughs begin to dwindle and the lines appearing on the face are wearing into a frown.  So next time there’s a crummy looking old black and white science fiction movie on your TV, don’t switch it off – sit down and prepare to have a good old chuckle WITH the film maker.  Doctor’s orders!

No comments:

Post a Comment